So on this fine morning, I found myself talking to a coworker about my old blogging habits. I realized that I hadn't actually looked at my high school blog in a long time and therefore I logged onto the site and re-read all of my old posts.As it would turn out, I remembered how much I enjoyed writing down my random, and sometimes rather hilarious, thoughts and thought "maybe I'd still enjoy this". Yes, I do believe in my life being private and not sharing intimate details with people that don't know me or aren't continuously active in my daily life, but at the same time- I don't share anything that's wildly personal that I wouldn't share in conversation with people that I meet and desire to get to know. I've always been "an open book" as some would say, so I see no harm in typing my random and sometimes wildly uninteresting thoughts- heck, it sure brought some enjoyment to me this morning!

I know we're all likely well acquainted with the website Pinterest.While some may not know the "purpose" of the site or really care to get on it, females feel some sort of draw to it and it's ability to help us not only pass time, but to find things that we either want to purchase, cook, craft, or read words that we think are meaningful (the Quotes section is definitely where I spend most of my time). While on Pinterest this morning, I found myself having a realization that, yes, seems rather "common sense" but astounded me.

I realized this morning that I get so upset when my daily experiences don't match up with my expectations. What I means is that, sometimes my nights don't go like I want them to, my relationships or friendships don't go like I would like them to, my family, my job, my school life, my living situations- sometimes my expectations don't meet up with reality.

 

(Ex: Tom and Summer from (500) Days of Summer)

There are days or just moments of my days that I think will go a certain way. I think that someone is going to treat me a certain way, feel a certain way about me, that my job will be either really busy and exciting or really relaxing and slow, that school will be wildly interesting or my assignments will be really well understood by me and helpful to my preparation for my career, that my family will interact in a particular fashion, that I will look or feel a specific way about myself.. I could carry on forever, but you likely get the point. My thought process this morning was that more often than not- my expectations don't align with my reality. And while that normally either devastates me or ticks me off- it's okay. I was reminded this morning that if our lives always went perfectly- we never had any let downs or hard times- we would never appreciate those times where in fact our reality does align with our expectations- when everything is going really well. Our world and our lives have been designed in a perfect balance (although that's hard to see sometimes because after all, the saying does go that "when it rains it pours) of both good and bad. And while we don't always see the bad with a silver lining- I have started seeing that lining more clearly in my thoughts this morning. People let us down, we let ourselves down, things aren't great all the time. Sometimes bad things happen or good things don't occur in the exact way we want them to. And while that can be upsetting or hurtful or whatever adjective you see fit there, it makes the times when we do receive the love we desire or the expectations we yearn for that much more appreciated and beautiful. I guarantee you that your heart wouldn't feel as light when you get little kisses on your shoulder from the one you love or when a friend truly makes you feel valued and cared for during times of need and want if you ALWAYS received those affirmations of affection. Feeling disconnected from ourselves, our loved ones, our families, our friends, our jobs, our schoolwork, our passions, our present, our future- that's all completely normal and isn't always a bad thing. We would never love the view from the mountain top if we never saw the darkness of the valleys. 

I'll stop there for fear that I could ramble on forever. 

Like I said before, none of this is life shattering or unheard of. I'm not reinventing the wheel here. But this was something the Lord laid on my heart this morning and therefore I felt inclined to share it. 

I've realized lately that I'm loving life. I am so stressed out over a multitude of things and I'm not always the happiest or cheeriest person, but man am I blessed by the Lord. I'm so grateful for everything I have and everyone that I share my mornings, days, and nights with. I cannot thank God enough for His provision and guidance in my life and even more so His grace and His love- none of which I am deserving of. 

Until I have something else to share: Love the life you live, people. It's a good one.

-ch.